You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
