UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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