Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
