Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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