theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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