so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
