what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
