i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
