I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
there is glitter all over my balls
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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