the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
and she was petting her beer can
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
