So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He's a Shit stain on my heart
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Randomize
