I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
