Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
