Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
