drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
