Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Randomize
