When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
