it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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