I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
