he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
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