This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
