I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
your like the ambassador to my penis.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
