I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
