South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
