porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize