he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
