how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize