you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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