Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
