we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
