Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
