I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
