Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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