no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
...so i touched it.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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