Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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