FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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