ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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