Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Randomize
