Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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