in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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