We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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