Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
