Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
