I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Randomize
