so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize