When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
COCAINE IS GR8
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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