halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
