I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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