In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
