We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
